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Asperger Farm

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A novella in which young hax0rs out of school are like, "we're going to use javascript and MongoDB and Apples and make the world a better place for douching". they chase the old coders away, except for Moses the Drunk Java Crow who hangs out and caws that to reach heaven they need but Scala Mountain. but then someone, probably Snowball the Samoan dude who'd said "fuck it" and gone back to grad school, pwns the shit out of their windmill, and the schedules are slipping, and they sell the intern to the knacker. that's when they realize the company wifi has changed its ESSID from


to the vaguely unsettling


gone unnoticed is Samoan party music pouring from a new neighbor's windows, and what seems an ESSID-based comeuppance


though much is made of a qa engineer's


well after much work and low rations, they produce a moderately successful product. they invite the old coders over to see their new digs. "check it out we got rid of that appletv and got a fileserver. we also fired all the girls. she took it pretty well." and then they began speaking in capital letters, DO and ABEND and SUBROUTINE fortranisms just popping out. and they looked from one to the other and could not tell which was which.

"Asperger Farm" is a grim fable, the portent of a dark future! fear