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** 5V, Data, Ground, or
** 5V, Data, Ground, or
** Ground, Data, 5V
** Ground, Data, 5V
i was hoping that 5V and Data would be on different sides, since the only way i was going to blow this thing up (afaik) was switching 5V and Ground. if Ground ran through the center, that wouldn't be possible. i wasn't sure how to determine which mapping was in play, so i went by color. there were white, black, and red sheaths, which map cleanly to 3 of the 4 USB2.0 bunches (USB has Data+ and Data- on white and green cables, respectively), and the white was between the red and black (just where we would expect the Data line to be under a USB interpretation), so i made an executive call and guessed that the red was live. i stripped and separated the three bunches, and used three 18AWG solder seal wire connectors together with a heat gun to bind them to three pins. into the Molex went the pins, into an ARGB connector went the assembly, and...boom! works! felt like a pimp. so now i'll have two working monoblocks, one full of gunk. yay, i guess?
* i was hoping that 5V and Data would be on different sides, since the only way i was going to blow this thing up (afaik) was switching 5V and Ground. if Ground ran through the center, that wouldn't be possible. i wasn't sure how to determine which mapping was in play, so i went by color. there were white, black, and red sheaths, which map cleanly to 3 of the 4 USB2.0 bunches (USB has Data+ and Data- on white and green cables, respectively), and the white was between the red and black (just where we would expect the Data line to be under a USB interpretation), so i made an executive call and guessed that the red was live. i stripped and separated the three bunches, and used three 18AWG solder seal wire connectors together with a heat gun to bind them to three pins. into the Molex went the pins, into an ARGB connector went the assembly, and...boom! works! felt like a pimp. so now i'll have two working monoblocks, one full of gunk. yay, i guess?
* '''2022-07-07:''' video cards arrive. i check the Copper Hydro 2080ti in my machine against my existing Aorus Master, and realize using it in the top slot will invalidate the shroud i'd laboriously designed+printed a few days earlier for my mobo-side drive bays. the world is cruel. i can't place it in a lower slot, as my Dual XTOP pump would be displaced. i ponder permutations that move the Dual XTOP, despite it looking kinda badass where it is, and conclude that the best thing to do is change up my shroud. said shroud was printed with carbon fiber-infused PETG, requiring a high-temperature extruder. my high-temperature extruder is fucked. i resolve to unfuck it. my 2070 Super turns out to be...the air-cooling components of a 2080ti, completely useless to me. i ask the ebay seller what the fuck; he replies what the fuck yourself; this has escalated to a chargeback following failed ebay dispute resolution. so that's no longer in play. 2080ti or go home.
* '''2022-07-07:''' video cards arrive. i check the Copper Hydro 2080ti in my machine against my existing Aorus Master, and realize using it in the top slot will invalidate the shroud i'd laboriously designed+printed a few days earlier for my mobo-side drive bays. the world is cruel. i can't place it in a lower slot, as my Dual XTOP pump would be displaced. i ponder permutations that move the Dual XTOP, despite it looking kinda badass where it is, and conclude that the best thing to do is change up my shroud. said shroud was printed with carbon fiber-infused PETG, requiring a high-temperature extruder. my high-temperature extruder is fucked. i resolve to unfuck it. my 2070 Super turns out to be...the air-cooling components of a 2080ti, completely useless to me. i ask the ebay seller what the fuck; he replies what the fuck yourself; this has escalated to a chargeback following failed ebay dispute resolution. so that's no longer in play. 2080ti or go home.
* '''2022-07-08:''' mobo arrives. i have lots of other shit to do, and am unhappy, so i'm fine with waiting for the new monoblock to be delivered. i'm also not looking forward to moving my $2000 CPU (now $3500, ugh, since when do chip prices go <i>up?</i>), nor installing the monoblock, nor inevitably feeling like an unscientific fool applying new thermal paste.
* '''2022-07-08:''' mobo arrives. i have lots of other shit to do, and am unhappy, so i'm fine with waiting for the new monoblock to be delivered. i'm also not looking forward to moving my $2000 CPU (now $3500, ugh, since when do chip prices go <i>up?</i>), nor installing the monoblock, nor inevitably feeling like an unscientific fool applying new thermal paste.
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* '''2022-07-12:''' i walk to the office to use one of our fancy Ultimakers. like every communally-administered 3d printer ever, they are nonfunctional. later, for lack of anything better to do, i declare war on screws. i take my machine completely apart to replace every screw with hex bolts. "they're less likely to strip, see, six sides to accept your luvvvvv", i say, attempting to justify this massive bit of effort to a friend. the bolts are from [https://monsterbolts.com/ MONSTERBOLTS] of florida, of whose vaguely Satanic trade dress i approve. while doing so, i move my top two 360mm radiators into the roof of my CaseLabs T10 Magnum. this requires cutting new watercooling tubes.
* '''2022-07-12:''' i walk to the office to use one of our fancy Ultimakers. like every communally-administered 3d printer ever, they are nonfunctional. later, for lack of anything better to do, i declare war on screws. i take my machine completely apart to replace every screw with hex bolts. "they're less likely to strip, see, six sides to accept your luvvvvv", i say, attempting to justify this massive bit of effort to a friend. the bolts are from [https://monsterbolts.com/ MONSTERBOLTS] of florida, of whose vaguely Satanic trade dress i approve. while doing so, i move my top two 360mm radiators into the roof of my CaseLabs T10 Magnum. this requires cutting new watercooling tubes.
* '''2022-07-13:''' my new monoblock arrives from Slovenia. i am having surgery the next day, and am excited to finally fucking finish this beforehand. i remove the factory cooling (large L-shaped heatsinks+heatpipes+fans) from my new Aorus Master. i (very carefully) move my 3970X, polish it, apply Thermal Grizzly Kyronaut Extreme thermal paste, spatula it around feeling vaguely stupid for twenty minutes, and go to install the new monoblock.
* '''2022-07-13:''' my new monoblock arrives from Slovenia. i am having surgery the next day, and am excited to finally fucking finish this beforehand. i remove the factory cooling (large L-shaped heatsinks+heatpipes+fans) from my new Aorus Master. i (very carefully) move my 3970X, polish it, apply Thermal Grizzly Kyronaut Extreme thermal paste, spatula it around feeling vaguely stupid for twenty minutes, and go to install the new monoblock.
 
** [https://twitter.com/nickblack/status/1547428661795725312 the monoblock will not fit.]
[https://twitter.com/nickblack/status/1547428661795725312 the monoblock will not fit.]
* i realize that this is "Revision 1.1" of the Gigabyte Aorus Master TRX40, compared to my original "Revision 1.0". looking for differences between the two, the sedulous inspector will notice two chokes on Rev1.1 where but one choke had been mounted on Rev1.0. this new choke prevents the monoblock from mating to Rev1.1. i go out onto my terrace, smoke a cigarette in silence, and finally erupt in a spectacular chain of expletives. i have no cooling option available for my CPU. the machine will not run this evening. i weep. even using a regular CPU block will now require reassembling the motherboard, a gigantic and questionable pain in the ass.
 
i realize that this is "Revision 1.1" of the Gigabyte Aorus Master TRX40, compared to my original "Revision 1.0". looking for differences between the two, the sedulous inspector will notice two chokes on Rev1.1 where but one choke had been mounted on Rev1.0. this new choke prevents the monoblock from mating to Rev1.1. i go out onto my terrace, smoke a cigarette in silence, and finally erupt in a spectacular chain of expletives. i have no cooling option available for my CPU. the machine will not run this evening. i weep. even using a regular CPU block will now require reassembling the motherboard, a gigantic and questionable pain in the ass.
* '''2022-07-14, 0900:''' my inguinal hernia is repaired in a largely painless procedure. i do not look at the machine, its pieces spread around my living room floor, mixed with tools, and manuals, and uncorraled fasteners of unknown province, and surgical gauze. to think of it is to think of my own failure, and for my eyes to burn in anguish and anger.
* '''2022-07-14, 0900:''' my inguinal hernia is repaired in a largely painless procedure. i do not look at the machine, its pieces spread around my living room floor, mixed with tools, and manuals, and uncorraled fasteners of unknown province, and surgical gauze. to think of it is to think of my own failure, and for my eyes to burn in anguish and anger.
* '''2022-07-14, 1900:''' i rush-order an [https://optimuspc.com/products/absolute-cpu-block-threadripper-3 Optimus Threadripper] block ($195) for next-day delivery. knowing Optimus to have a reputation of shipping late and full of the magnanimity induced by Lortab hydrocodone, i also reserve a [https://www.icegiantcooling.com/ IceGiant ProSiphon Elite] from Microcenter ($108).
* '''2022-07-14, 1900:''' i rush-order an [https://optimuspc.com/products/absolute-cpu-block-threadripper-3 Optimus Threadripper] block ($195) for next-day delivery. knowing Optimus to have a reputation of shipping late and full of the magnanimity induced by Lortab hydrocodone, i also reserve a [https://www.icegiantcooling.com/ IceGiant ProSiphon Elite] from Microcenter ($108).
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